Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitaki Koga's “The Courage to Be Disliked” is a deep examination of the work of Alfred Adler in the field of individual psychology. The book emphasizes self-agency, which is the ability to act autonomously and make choices that align with one's values and aspirations.

1. Being Present is “The Gift”

Adler's principle of living in the present allows us to focus on choices and actions that are within our control. If we adopt an abundance mindset and accept our earlier ways, it will liberate us from past burdens and future anxieties.

2. Self Agency over “Likability”

We can take responsibility for living our best lives by recognizing our agency and taking control of our destiny. Taking responsibility for living our best lives is not only achievable but could be cosmically interwoven into the purpose of life itself.

[um_loggedin]

3. Seek Task-Oriented Motivation

Adler, who was a student of Freud, believed that true fulfillment comes from within rather than external validation. By finding meaning and satisfaction in our actions, we liberate ourselves from the need for approval from others.

To achieve this, it is important to make things visible in our environment. Set them up for easy adoption into a new routine, and learn to create resilient habits by intention.

4. Growth Over Recognition

”The Courage to Be Disliked” encourages us to adopt a growth mindset, embracing the belief that we have the power to change and improve ourselves. According to Simone Biles, a world-renowned gymnast, recognition is only a byproduct of commitment to constant improvement and hard work.

5. Community Building vs Social Comparison

Comparing ourselves to others can lead to feelings of inadequacy and inferiority. We should focus on jobs that help our communities instead of striving for practicality. This is just as the book encourages focusing on peace and connection rather than social comparison.

6. Choose Healthy Boundaries over Trauma

Trauma can stifle growth and trigger reactions to others' behavior. To address the trauma, honest conversations can be had from the start. It also helps to address tolerance and preferences while encouraging the setting of boundaries and prioritizing well-being.

7. Past Experiences Mold Our Ideal Future

The past offers valuable lessons for personal growth, especially when hard lessons are encountered. These lessons can lead to self-awareness, self-mastery, and awakening to our divine purpose.

8. Focus on Tasks Before Goals

Adlerians suggest focusing on meaningful tasks that contribute to long-term objectives. Breaking them down into manageable tasks will maintain a sense of progress and accomplishment. The point is to make incremental steps in one’s life with minimal to no self-criticism or judgment.

9. Happiness as a Conscious Choice

Happiness is not a destination but rather a choice we make every day. We often rely on others for happiness, but it's essential to cultivate it in our own lives. Finding joy in simple things, like food, can bring joy to mundane days.

10. Accept Disapproval

This self-help book urges readers to embrace their authenticity and follow their own paths despite opposition. It serves as a beacon of hope, wisdom, and empowerment, especially during a global awakening and the heavy weight of news and social media. It places emphasis on the importance of discernment in reclaiming self-sovereignty and observing life lessons.

Self-reflection can be practiced to identify true desires. This can be particularly true during meditation, yoga, and journaling. We free ourselves from the need to be approved by others when we find meaning and satisfaction in what we do.

Is embracing Adlerian psychology, prioritizing self-agency over external validation, the key to unlocking true fulfillment and personal growth in modern society?

[/um_loggedin]

################

We value your opinion! Please take a moment to share your thoughts by filling out our brief survey linked below this article.